Friday, March 19, 2010

One more thing.

It has come to my attention that the majority of what I have posted here seems to be school related. I can assure you that this is nothing more than a coincidence. I started this a while back, and decided now to resume it. Generally, I'm all over the place.

School

Here's an odd one. Again, I'll just recap things as I remember them. Events may not be chronological, transitional, or sequential.

I found myself in my high school. I was in the room where I would normally have taken bio classes with Mr. Pelosi. The test was for bio, but the teacher was my freshman Bio 111 professor. My feelings were such that I had no idea what the test was going to be about. The only thing I could think about was how I was probably going to just get a B for the semester instead of an A. Upon receiving the test, the questions were all long answer and they seemed incomprehensible. I specifically remember one that was asking something in the range of photon interactions with electrons with a specific substance. The substance was (FO)(FO)(FO)(FO)(FO) (which isn't an actual substance, thus in itself makes no sense). I later read through the other questions to see which ones I knew and they too made no sense, though they weren't mathematically based for the most part. Still, I had the feeling that I was going to do awful on the test. The professor seemed to be saying that he'd give credit for funny answers. I kept going up to him with questions on the test, though I don't remember that I was asking him. I suppose it had more to do with "Is this answer acceptable for credit?"

The room itself, as stated, was Mr. Pelosi's room where he taught Biology in my freshman year of High School. The desks were those regular old high school desks with blue seats. If you were facing the blackboard, they were all arranged such that they were all facing to the right towards the door. There were other students in there, though I don't remember any of them.

I also had another test in a different room. This one was English related. Perhaps it was a paper due. I honestly don't remember too much about this one. I think it was my English Professor from my first semester in college, Mrs. Thompson. I don't remember the assignment, all I knew was that I was either late or unprepared. Again, all I could think about was not having a perfect grade.

Later on, related to the dream but different in its own right, I remember walking into my high school gym before school started. At least I walked into the doors that would lead to the lower cafeteria. I found myself in what I realize now was the gym of my middle school. I'm not sure why I had to go to my high school. It was something related to taking a certain class for some reason, or at least that's what I was telling people. It felt awkward being there. There was the gym, but there were also glass cubicles with the students wearing my high school uniform inside doing what looked like, well, school related things. I mostly remember there being glass cubicles on the right more so than anywhere else. In front of me was the vacant area where the basketball courts would be, though this time it was substantially smaller. If anything, it felt like I was inside more of an atrium then a gym. I knew it was early, before the start of school, yet there seemed to be more students present in that place then there should have been. Someone recommended to me that I should just go through the locker rooms to get inside. It seemed like a normal decision but I felt hesitant towards it. I remember being inside the school somehow later on. I was outside some locker talking to someone I didn't know. I felt short though. Shorter than I actually am. Perhaps I was kneeling or crouching.

Randomly I remember seeing a face that I knew when I was still in high school. The last name was Maloney, but I forget her first name. It some someone to whom I have never really spoken to, but knew the face. Her sister was in my grade, so I knew the family name, just not the first name. I asked her what she was doing there in a nonchalant way, trying to sound disarming and non-threatening. I suppose there was a sense of security in knowing that I wasn't the only graduate being in there at the time. I don't remember any kind of response, but there could have been. For some reason, I also remember looking into the reflection in a nearby door that had a dark room behind it (the doors all had windows at chest level). In the reflection there seemed to be a mask that appeared next to her face in the reflection, though the mask appeared much more opaque than her own reflection. It was the mask of a person. Similar features to her own I believe, but I could be mistaken.

Next I was outside. It was outside of the school. I was walking up a hill which was an exacerbated rendition of what's really outside my high school at present. I don't remember seeing the school next to me however. I was headed somewhere, but it surely wasn't home. I felt like I was trying to get to the nearby subway station. I felt like it was either Braintree or one of the Quincy Stations. Perhaps Quincy Center or Quincy Adams. someone pulled over from the side of the road and asked me if I wanted a ride. He was driving in a white sedan that looked to be a level above standard. Perhaps slightly more luxurious. Again, it was a familiar face from high school, thought in this instance I don't remember who. It was a member of the class below mine, I do know that. I suppose I could say a name, but I'm truly not sure. It seemed to be a mix of two people. Both individuals are Irish, but this guy looked more Italian, 5 o'clock shadow, and a short hair cut. A high and tight that had grown out for a few weeks with gelled hair spiked on top. He looked like a business man. He was wearing a collared shirt, light blue I believe. I don't remember if he had a jacket on or not. If he did, it was a suit jacket.

We drove by the point that I wanted to get off at. It was then that I asked "Where are you going?" He just looked to me and said "I'm just going straight. Let me know when you want to get off at." I didn't feel threatened by him at all. If anything, I was actually curious as to where I would end up if I just stayed in the car. He said no specific destination, he was just driving forward. Most interesting indeed. It's now that I REALLY begin to wonder where that would have led had I not woken up.

I would like to say that I am enjoying writing these immensely. The allow me to ponder things that I wouldn't have thought of otherwise. Perhaps I'll have some friend, or even a complete stranger, who will bump into these and find some sort of interpretation in them. The scientist in me tells me that dreams are nothing more than vivid hallucinations. Though there is still a curious element in me that wonders if there's perhaps some other deeper meaning. In either case, it's fun to go over a dream that you had a year later. Perhaps later in time I'll figure out what all of this means.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Former dream

This one was from March 7th, 2009. I found a folder that I had written it in.

I had a dream that I was in a passenger’s seat in what I’m assuming was a truck. It was night time and we (I don’t know if there was someone else with me but the truck was moving and I was on the left seat of the vehicle in the front) had the headlights on. It was on a highway with no lights. Trees on either side and a double yellow stripe divider. Two lane. Suddenly I see this woman pop in front of me. Glasses, large and what looked like plastic frames. She was white and rather plain. Dark long hair. She just seemed to suddenly appear from the right and walk in the road directly in front of the truck. A distance so close that there would have been no hope of stopping. She second she appeared she looked at me accusingly. Then I woke up.

Related to School... Somehow?

First things first, the grammar on all of these is going to be horrible. I write them as they come to me as more a form of notation.

That being said:

I’m not entirely sure of all details but I’ll write what I remember.

In one part, I remember walking in the snow from my parent’s house up the hill towards the mailbox. I’m not sure what I was wearing, and there was only very light snow outside, half an inch to an inch. As I was walking, I remember my feet feeling warm. As I continued up the hill, there was a sudden feeling of wet cold on my feet. I looked down and realized I was in my thick hiking socks. I looked back and saw my footprints. I decided to keep walking forward and really didn’t feel the snow through my socks again provided that I didn’t think about it.

In another (separate?) dream, I was at school. However, the school resembled that more of my high school in what kind of reminded me of Mr. Polsi’s room.

Before had, I seem to recall being in a class where someone was telling us to write things down for what I assumed was a lab. We were being told to write these totally arbitrary things down on what looked like some kind of map. At the same time, I remember being at the location being talked about. I seemed to fluctuate back and forth. The location was outside. There was a bridge to my left. Similar to a tiny suspension bridge or one that looked something like a freeway bridge. I seem to recall water under it with a shore perfectly parallel to it. To my right was a concrete platform. A block with something on top of it, maybe something else. Details about some path taken had to be written down in order to do the lab correctly.

This may be another part. I was later trying to figure out what had to be done in order to do the assignment. I had this feeling that the deadline had already passed. I was trying to find a locker. In an earlier dream, I remember being in the same area opening a locker with my old locked combination. I remember unlocking it, but I don’t remember taking anything out. I remember someone to my right initially looking at me. I’m not sure who it was. Later, as previously stated, I was trying to get back into my locker. The number on the locker was 050. I tried my combination but it didn’t work. Perhaps I went by the “5”, which was the second number in the combination, too quickly I remember thinking. I couldn’t get it open. Someone else was with me. Maybe Kate Funderburk? It was a fimiliar face associated with someone that I knew in highschool. I was saying that I didn’t think that this was my locker and that I wasn’t sure which locker was mine. Upon stating this, there was some older woman standing there to my left. Again, another familiar face but I’m not sure who. In the dream she felt familiar. Someone I had met before. I said that I forgot where my locker was. She asked me a question, and I answered, but she didn’t seem to be looking for the information I was looking for. My locker. The locker in both instances was a bottom locker (there was one locker above and one below in the whole thing). I looked around the hallway. It was lit, but there seems to be a lot of light coming from outside. I looked down the hallway and noticed this. There seemed to be a picture window in the stairwell that could be seen through doors with large full-sized windows with a single piece of glass. Thinnk a regular door but with the first 6-12 inches of the parameter being solid door and the rest being glass. The stairwell windows were bisected in the middle.

I had some sort of revelation at that point that we should go check the other end of the hallway for my locker. That maybe I was on the wrong side. Though I thought this, I just headed straight to the classroom. At this point, there were only me and two or three others int here. It felt like the class had already passed and that this was taking place after regular school hours. I felt that she was going to repeat which questions had to be done. The instructor had some sort fo accent. I believe it was Russian. I saw some original copy of the map with the path traced along it. I opened my notebook and found that assignment as well as the ones after and before it.

At this point I was either handed a paper or I found it in there with my grades for the assignment. The first grade I saw looked like it said 18% or -18%. I had the feeling that I didn’t do well at all. The first page looked like a roadmap. It was stapled at the top. The second page said something like 94%. I checked to see what was done wrong on that. When I looked, it seemed that things were marked wrong that shouldn’t have been. Where I had multiplied something by 6/6, it was crossed out and written in red ink as 2/2 * 3/3, which was the same thing. I believe there were some other things in there as well, I assume dealing with using a different letter to denote a variable in an equation. I feel that I saw another paper, but I forgot what It said.

I was partially relieved when I saw the missing papers, so that I didn’t have to copy down what had to be done again. At the same time, I felt that I was going to have to argue the point of the assignment being late. I should note that the map itself looked like ti related to water, but it wasn’t topographical. It was crudely drawn and had been photocopied. It looked similar to a child’s drawing in black and white lines. It was more or less an outline.

Again, I saw myself outside. I was in that field again with the bridge to my left. I walked up to the concrete platform, which sloped up on its front side evenly. That side was covered in grass, not concrete. There was a road on top. I got onto the bus with my mom (I’m not sure, but I feel like it was my mom). The bus driver started driving. Something came up and I found out he used to be in the Marines. Our stop apparently was near some gas station. We drove by it once, after I had already pushed the “request stop” button. Whoever was with me, my Mom I believe, though tthat we had just missed our stop. I had a feeling that the driver was going to swing around and take a different path. He eventually did. I reember the turn being sharp, and that I had to hold on as the turn was sharp and fast.

The gas station seemed to resemble being near the corner of that onramp going from wollaston to north quincy near the highschool. Though we were coming from the opposite direction, not from wollaston. At the same time, now that I think of it, it also looked like (as far as the roads were concerned in both cases) the gas station that I used to stop by with Bart in Okinawa. Perhaps it was a hybrid of both. There was a grassy, slightly wooded area behind it. The bus driver was saying something about some raccoons in the area, or at least that’s what I gathered from him. He opened the door and there one was, however it was near some porcupines. He seemed to refer to the raccoons as though they were human. I don’t’ remember what he said specifically. I remember getting off the bus, and whoever was with me may have as well. When I got off the bus, I sat down next to one raccoon. The grown sloped downward, where I was on the top of the slope. There were porcupines as I said, who seemed much more interested in greeting me. I felt as though they could talk as well. That or I could understand what they were thinking. More came and they just kept brushing up against me. For some reason, It was as though their quills were very shirt, more like that of a cactus. I felt that they were hurting the raccoons, and that it bothered them, but at the same time, they were putting up little resistance.

I remember feeling getting hit by the quills of the porcupines as they just brushed up against me, though I feel that at first it was a friendly greeting. In aother part, one seemed to be getting defensive and while facing away from me, was sticking his hair on end, which would in turn hit my arm by mistake. I could get up or get away from that area at the moment.

There also seemed to be a raccoon there who looked like he was either sleeping or passive, but had porcupines all around him who seemed to be just lying there.

At that point I got up and started taking the quills that had stuck off of my skin. Where they were once small, they were now huge and had penetrated fully into my skin completely, albeit for the tips which were sticking out of my skin, stretching it as they poked. One in particular near my elbow on ym right arm stuck my skin out about three inched. I yanked it out quickly and it went away. I started noticing the same effect all over my arms, so I started pulling them out. I was surprised at how relatively little pain there was. The first one I pulled out looked like it was a good six to eight inches long. There was another one that I remember specifically that was poking. I looked to another part of my arm and saw a white tip. It felt like that was going to be more difficult to remove, but I also noticed that it was one large one in me that was running parallel with my arm, and was poking out at both ends. I remember trying to remove it. That was the last thing I remember.

I want to also say that I remember there was another part of the dream that related to that map mentioned earlier. It was myself and some others doing something. IT felt important, but could have been bad or mischievous. That perhaps someone didn't want us to do the certain thing. If I remember what happened, I'll be sure to write it down.